Sigh!

Well now that excitement has abated a little...

I'm going to have a talk with myself! Lol. I'm sorry, but I have to lament. Why, oh why, do I ALWAYS have to like people that don't like... omg... that Hugh Laurie guy has an English accent! weird...
oops... sidetracked...

yeah. So why? I know it's EVERYone's lament and EVERYONE gets it yadiyadiya... but sigh. I am afraid i'm sick of people telling me how "it's all just waiting for you in the future" or "you'll find the right person one day" or "there's someone out there for you" or "people who don't like you are just stupid." WELL I'm sorry, but whoever says that , unless you're female, IT MEANS YOU'RE STUPID TOO! What i want to know is

• why can't i find mr. not-so-right-but-close-enough-to-right-now-he'll-do
• why subtle hints seem to fall on deaf ears... if you get it, just say that you're not interested!
  
• why guys let you waste your time on them when you could be over that hill in two shakes of a whatchamacallit and onto the next
• why guys are stupid

i guess i can answer most of them myself. Still. It's stupid.

If you're reading this and thinking "what a desperado", please find a pistol and insert it into your mouth an depress the trigger. I am not a desperado. What i am is a choleric! (angry, for those of you not versed in the ways of choleric, sanguine, melancholy and phlegmatic) It is so annoying. Maybe, just maybe, i haven't cared about being single. In fact, it's quite nice and i think i'd have a hard time changing (not that i wouldnt! don't take that as a nada!) but it's just ALL those people with all their sympathy and kind words and crappy mccraptastic that just rubs it in that little bit more. If there is such a general concensus that I'm some sort of dish ready to be served, i wanna know why i'm about to become salmonella'd, infected with e coli and chucked out. (i like the metaphors... the analogies, if you will). Maybe i'm too confronting? I don't know. I don't disillusion myself into thinking that i could be physically attractive, although it would be nice to think that at least SOMEONE could be enchanted by my personality! If my personality is bland, then whatever. Oh - and any smart alec who wants to comment on here about my personality being crap or i'm a crap person or whatever - go to hell, i'm not talking to you. This post is for my friends, and in no way are you welcome on this blog, or any blog of mine for that matter.

Back to mein story, mein rant, mein lament, mein bemusement with the state of my psyche :) I have summed up that, although it would be nice to be noticed - i like to lament. I like it a lot. Let's face it, friends of the girl variety - isn't it more fun to sit around and complain about guys, and your love life, and everything else like that - than have to be with a guy? They're only short term after all! :p One for all Rosie's single ladeez (now how hardKore is that) out there. Peace out. I'm rambling, i'm bored. I'M IN LOVE!!

xxrosie

WELL! I am just writing a brief message on here to tell you all that I AM FEEEENEEEESHED forever! TEE is over. It is OVER. I am finished. Thank you.

That is all

xxrosie

Hello all!

Well, I will probably make a few entries on this tonight.. just cos I'm avoiding lit study.

Ok, because I just discovered the thing up the top of this where I can make lists, I'm going to make a list. Yes, i know. My lists are hard to top. So far on my msn space I've made the Lana's blunders and 41. t hings about being a viola lists, and they are going to be hard to beat. So, I won't try. I'm going to make a list now.

Things I love about:

1. My Friends

• They are always there at the exact moment you realise you haven't got enough money to buy whatever it is you're trying to buy
• ... and they have money
• They know what you're thinking about (although this isn't ALWAYS a good thing)
• they do funny dances at parties with you when everyone else is asleep
• you can make the worst joke in the world yet they'll still find it funny, or manage to make it funny by saying "now, imagine if you said that instead of laughing..."
• they pretend to like the music you like, even when you play it to them on the phone ALL the time and they really hate it.
• they read your blog, even when you know it's a heap of crap
• politics just never enters the equation (that is you+me=friends... it's never you+me=friends, given that you are inclined to my political beliefs, also written as (friendsyour beliefs = my beliefs) yeah that's right APPLIED KNOWLEDGE i should have done applic
• you can laugh at them, not just with them, and it doesn't matter
• they put up with me constantly talking... that applies to lana
• if you don't have an inside voice, like lana, they still love you
• it doesn't matter if you're wearing the daggiest thing in the world... the worst comment you'll get is "where'd you get those clothes the... toilet store"
• we all like the same movies... to a degree... thinking about labyrinth here...
• no one dates each other
• we can all pretty much be slobbish or at least not poserish... and they don't care
• we're all musical to some degree
• we share common hates
• no one does drugs... and if they do i'll kill them
• if you want to be crazy.... on most occasions, they'll join you

2. The world

• The sun rises
• the moon rises
• there is dew on the grass on a cool morning
• there are beautiful things
• there is such a delicate balance in which everything hangs
• there are too many things to write here
• people are alive
• animals are alive
• i can watch something as simple as my dog lift her head and sniff and feel happy for the rest of the night
• tears are as salty as the sea
• an amoeba is one celled... unicellular
• we all evolved from a unicellular bacterium
• thousands of bacteria can live in any one place and you would never know there were there... millions even
• language is as diverse as life
• sound travels in waves, and so does water
• the amount of any one thing on earth never changes, unless it's disposed of in space
• bubbles are round
• you can touch things and feel them
• something like the internet can exist

Well, I'm listed out for a while now.

l&r

xxrosie

I cannot workout how to put a title on this thing. It's probably really easy... but i simply am not that able. If someone would like to enlighten me, then please do. Well, i know i said i wouldnt write here until after tee but i am so bored. and i have half an hour to kill before i am going to make myself go to bed, and because neither david nor mark are entertaining me so much that i cannot type for being entertained - i have come here. I have been inspired in the past few days to study. I have sat here, for just hours, and, coupled with brief intervals of out-of-window staring, have studied like i have not before. Yet, that feeling of satisfaction has failed to come. Why not?! It's so damn annoying! I finally do what i thought would stop those guilt pangs that i interpreted as hunger pangs, but no! They have not! I have stepped into the abyss - and realised how much i actually haven't done in the past. And it's awful. If possible, i feel like i have done less in the study i have now done than i did before when i frolicked in the sun like the ectotherms i have spent the past two days explaining to the thirteen past-tee exams for biology. But enough about study. It's still sitting here in front of me and i still feel like an imbecile with all those history pages just gawking at me and threatening to sel destruct if i do not avidly update my knowledge on gorbachev and perestroika. I want to ask - what do we do now? After five - nay - twelve years, even thirteen years, of babying, we are stepping into the world of adults and big people. So, we've always been told we are too young to know anything, to feel love, to know (i'll tell you when you're older") or to understand. We've been in teenage-induced limbo for a couple of years now, too old to be children (damn transperth!) and too young to be adults. Now, we're pushed into it. I don't want to go - i dont know about some of my friends, but im satisfied at being refused alcohol, entry to clubs, with being protected and looked after. I simply cannot understand how, in 112 days, i will be fit to vote, drink, party, do adultish things and see X-rated movies, when i still want to yell "statutory rape!" when someone remotely suggests anything lewd. It doesn't make sense. There should be an adjustment period - and many of my peers will disagree, but there should be. From say, 16-18, where you can do somethings and you cant others. Ok, so you can drive and have sex, but they have to be the two most irresponsible things you can give as legal rights to teenagers. Just as michelle roberts and her "i want to raise the number of hours you have to drive as a 2nd phase L plater from 25 to 120 hours" rhetoric (i mean, come on, petrol prices woman!) will tell you. Why can't we be allowed to buy say, 4 standard drinks of alcohol per day, per week, per month, whatever, to give us a taste, so that on our 18th we don't end up sloshed and maybe even dead, or we end up sloshed or dead -even worse- illegally, under 18. It doesn't seem right. Correct me if im wrong, but you can also buy scratchies at 16. To me, that says "OK KIDS! YOU CAN HANDLE A LETHAL WEAPON, GAMBLE AWAY WHAT POTENTIALLY COULD BE A LOT OF MONEY IF YOU GET ADDICTED, AND TRY AND MAKE BABIES, BEFORE YOU ARE 18 AND ALLOWED FULL ADULT RIGHTS!" Apart from not making sense, it makes people like John Howard look boring, because he's had those rights for years and he still hasn't got a bigman voice. That had nothing to do with anything.

Alas, now we must leave. We are finished. We have been stamped, dated and booted out of existence. We have been wiped from school records (well, not really) and if we want to go back, we have to sign in as visitors. After 5 years of trekking the school yard with my uniform on, my schoolbad lagging behind me, and knowing the place back to front, it has been drawn from underneath me. For those of you not there yet, you will understand when you get here. Its a weird thing - awesome, yet terrifying. I can't explain it. To me, the weirdest thing will just be the loss of routine. The loss of a way of life, the last time i will ever sit in biol chairs, go to the toilet there, sit in history and not do work, spend lunchtimes playing murder in the dark in the storeroom. A whole lot of 'lasts' - and no idea as of yet where the firsts will begin.

Adios, estudiantes + amigos.

xxrosie