Any minute now

Any minute now, my ship is coming in
Silent tears - as silent as tears can be - crashing down my cheeks, flushed red, the blood rushing through them. You tell me take the light into me. To understand, to follow through with the plans I have made. I can only crease my forehead and grin. Not grin. Clench my teeth and decry all I behold. I can only come upon this pain I am in and suddenly feel. Only now, only now. The irony slaps me in the burning red face. My mask is wearing thin and only now can I see through the eyes. I lived all my goshed life numb and happy, no pain no pleasure. Why take the bad with the good when you can have the nothing? I reasoned.

Time is leaving me. You take my hand and hold it close to your waist. My love, my love, my love. Don't burn alone. I'll burn with you.

And suddenly the brightest words in my life shine like a beacon in the endless dreary night that carries on like a long held F in a chorus of E. It's cloudless, sadless. It's an echoey hall. I'll. burn. with. you.

With you.

With.

With me!

The wave of tiredness crashes down on me, a great wall of weariness, washing, waking. We don't burn.

No, no, no tears from you. I can only silently cry. Long ago the silence started. You must not.You must follow the path ahead, the plans we had made. Follow the dusty grainy path, where no footsteps lie ahead of you. I, my love, my love, must stop here. The flush of red has spread. I am lying here. They come for me now, I can see that. Any minute now. Any minute. Second. Go, love. Don't weep, I will not remain here. Time is leaving me. Be still, go on, take my light, I don't need it now. Don't wait for your life to happen. Be there before it does, before someone else takes hold, and takes you away, before your face flushes red and you lie in white on a bed not yours on a night not your own, with blood that is yours not in you. Stay on your path, your side of the road.

Any minute now.