kiss kiss bang bang

wait! she comes to a stop beside him, hands on her knees, panting. wait...a sec.

what? he scuffs impatiently, looking over his shoulder at a clock that could be there.

i'm addicted to you. she stands up straight, a panted agony on her face, wiping her brow with her sleeve. can't help it. addicted.

you're addicted to me? he opens his eyes a bit wider. what?

yeah, i know. her breathing slows a little. sounds stupid-

-is stupid. what? how can you be addicted to some---me?

don't know. wish i knew. she looks away for the time, clock behind him telling her nothing. just...am.

right...okay. do we have to talk about this now?

FUCK. yes we have to!

alrighty then. well?

don't know. don't...know. i'm, i, i just, need. to see you. a lot.

i'd figured.

no shut up, i... she falters. i need you.

you need me? i'm sorry, i can't do-

-i don't want that. i just want you. i can't explain it-

-so i see.

i don't care if we date. i don't care if we don't. i just need you. more.

why? what's good about me?

nothing! nothing nothing, there's nothing good about you.

there's bleak winter sunlight filtering through the trees above. thanks.

no, yes, you know what i mean don't you? he shrugs his black pullover, plays with his bag strap.

well it's a bit strange-

-you know i'm strange.

ha. yeah i know.

yeah so get over it. i can't help it. i'm addicted to you. every time i do something i think of you. everytime i want to tell someone something i want to tell you. everytime i fucking move i think about what it would be like with you there.

does that not sound scary to you?

wha-fuck you. think beyond the here and now for a second would you. do you always have to be so fucking literal?

well, yeah here i do.

ugh why am i ever heeere. see, i'm here and i feel like fucking shit. but i still like being with you. god, if i said this to anyone else, if anyone said this to any girl in any movie ever they'd be married with three kids by now.

well that's my point, i don't want that do i?

i'm not here to stifle what you want. i'm here to say what i want. and it's you. i told you, i don't care if you don't want to date me, now, ever. i...

you what?

i don't know. i ache for you.

ha.

no shut up, not like that. i want to hug you, love you, talk to you, have you mean the most to me.

god, do you have to talk like that?

yes i do! i'm sorry if it's not what you want to hear.

i can't. why now? why like this?

because i'm sick of it. i'm being tortured. i feel sick.

what do you want me to do about it?

well clearly this is fucked up. great. this always happens. fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck-

-hang on-

-no fuck off. fuck OFF. don't touch me! i can't do this. this always happens i don't ask for this but it always happens i want ONCE just ONCE for someone to love me more than i love them!

...

i...i don't know what i can do. this is it. this is where it ends. it's here that i lose part of myself and spiral deeper again-

-spiral what? you're getting all psycho on me-

-i. didn't. ask. you. to talk.

sorry...

i...i'll see you...sometime

alright.